Buy Me an Eliot

When Ashtray moves to South Central L.A. to live with his father (who appears to be the same age he is) and grandmother (who likes to talk tough and smoke reefer), he falls in with his gang-banging cousin Loc Dog, who along with the requisite pistols and Uzi carries a thermo-nuclear warhead for self-defense. Will Ashtray be able to keep living the straight life?

When an upwardly mobile couple find themselves unemployed and in debt, they turn to armed robbery in desperation.

On an ordinary night, in an ordinary part of town, a beautiful young woman walks into a bar. Her name is Jewel, and before long she is chatting to bartender Randy. The pair leave together, but he ends up getting into a tussle with her criminal boyfriend, who she then shoots dead, later persuading Randy to take the rap for her. But this isn't the end of it, as both Randy's cousin Carl and the detective assigned to the murder case also fall for Jewel's charms and find themselves caught up in the ensuing events. It seems that any man who meets Jewel falls instantly in love with her, and she's going to use this fully to her own advantage, leaving a trail of havoc in her wake. It also seems that she is going to get away with it - that is, until Randy decides to hire a hitman...

An eccentric, if not charming Southern professor and his crew pose as a band in order to rob a casino, all under the nose of his unsuspecting landlord – a sharp old woman.

The mafia's Paul Vitti is back in prison and will need some serious counseling when he gets out. Naturally, he returns to his analyst Dr. Ben Sobel for help and finds that Sobel needs some serious help himself as he has inherited the family practice, as well as an excess stock of stress.

Angelo "Snaps" Provolone made his dying father a promise on his deathbed: he would leave the world of crime and become an honest businessman. Despite having no experience in making money in a legal fashion, Snaps sets about to keep his promise.

Angela de Marco is fed up with her gangster husband's line of work and wants no part of the crime world. When her husband is killed for having an affair with the mistress of mob boss Tony "The Tiger" Russo, Angela and her son depart for New York City to make a fresh start. Unfortunately, Tony has set his sights upon Angela -- and so has an undercover FBI agent looking to use her to bust Tony.

One night Jefferson Reed gets hit in the chest by a souped-up chunk of meteor. So he can fly, but he's scared of heights. He can master the information in any book ... for about thirty seconds. Now his friends and family want him to protect their community from the dreaded Golden Lords.

Exploring every facet of ‘Weird Al’ Yankovic’s life, from his meteoric rise to fame with early hits like ‘Eat It’ and ‘Like a Surgeon’ to his torrid celebrity love affairs and famously depraved lifestyle, this biopic takes audiences on a truly unbelievable journey through Yankovic’s life and career, from gifted child prodigy to the greatest musical legend of all time.

Disaster strikes when a criminal mastermind reveals the identities of all active undercover agents in Britain. The secret service can now rely on only one man - Johnny English. Currently teaching at a minor prep school, Johnny springs back into action to find the mysterious hacker. For this mission to succeed, he’ll need all of his skills - what few he has - as the man with yesterday’s analogue methods faces off against tomorrow’s digital technology.

An aging ex-boxer gangster working as muscle for a Boston crime boss receives an upsetting diagnosis. Despite a faltering memory, he attempts to rectify the sins of his past and reconnect with his estranged children. He is determined to leave a positive legacy for his grandson, but the criminal underworld isn’t done with him and won’t loosen their grip willingly.

Mike Fallon, the Accident Man, is a stone cold killer. When a loved one is murdered by his own crew, Fallon is forced to avenge the one person who actually meant something to him.

Only one man has the particular set of skills... to lead Police Squad and save the world: Lt. Frank Drebin Jr. Following in his father's footsteps, he must solve a murder case to prevent Police Squad from closure.

Left on the doorstep of an orphanage run by nuns, three newborn knuckleheads grow up to be finger-poking, nyuk-nyuking janitors named Larry, Curly and Moe. When they learn that financial problems will soon force the only home they've ever known to close, the trio sets out to raise $830,000 in one month. Out in the world for the very first time, the three innocent bumblers become embroiled in a murder plot and find stardom on a TV reality show.

Virgil Starkwell is intent on becoming a notorious bank robber. Unfortunately for Virgil and his not-so-budding career, he is completely incompetent.

After making their way through high school (twice), big changes are in store for officers Schmidt and Jenko when they go deep undercover at a local college. But when Jenko meets a kindred spirit on the football team, and Schmidt infiltrates the bohemian art major scene, they begin to question their partnership. Now they don't have to just crack the case - they have to figure out if they can have a mature relationship. If these two overgrown adolescents can grow from freshmen into real men, college might be the best thing that ever happened to them.

While doing the inventory for a lingerie outlet in a high rise office building, five attractive women are terrorized by a series of bizarre killings. They suspect that the strange janitor, who witnessed another series of killings six months previously, is at the bottom of the whole thing. Little do they know the real horror that they face in the end.

A DEA agent and an undercover Naval Intelligence officer who have been tasked with investigating one another find they have been set up by the mob -- the very organization the two men believe they have been stealing money from.

Caught in the middle of a bank robbery, a slacker and a bank employee become the ones who arbitrate the intense situation.

Kevin Hart - playing a version of himself - is on a death-defying quest to become an action star. And with a little help from John Travolta, Nathalie Emmanuel, and Josh Hartnett - he just might pull it off.

A female lawyer sets up her own practice but only achieves success as an attorney for the mob.

A loyal henchman is ordered by his boss to keep an eye on his mistress, and trouble begins when he refuses to kill her.

Sentenced to six years in prison, Malik El Djebena is alone in the world and can neither read nor write. On his arrival at the prison, he seems younger and more brittle than the others detained there. At once he falls under the sway of a group of Corsicans who enforce their rule in the prison. As the 'missions' go by, he toughens himself and wins the confidence of the Corsican group.

An enterprising producer believes he has hit upon a winning concept: a program of original animated shorts set to classical music. Undeterred by warnings that this has already been done by an American named 'Prisney,' he rallies an orchestra of geriatric women, a bullish conductor, and an animator that he keeps locked in the dungeon. What could go wrong?

Two Arkansas firemen, Vince and Don, get hold of a map that leads to a cache of stolen gold in an abandoned factory in East St. Louis. What they don't know is that the factory is on the turf of a local gang, who come by to execute one of their enemies. Vince sees the shooting, the gang spots Vince, and extended mayhem ensues. As Vince and Don try to escape, gang leader King James argues with his subordinate Savon about how to get rid of the trespassers.

A man, Milan steps off a train, into a small French village. As he waits for the day when he will rob the town bank, he runs into an old retired poetry teacher named M. Manesquier. The two men strike up a strange friendship and explore the road not taken, each wanting to live the other's life.

One morning our little Viking village of Flake is raided by frightening looking spooky demons who kidnap all the children… except for Wickie, who was stuck in a tree trying to use a kite to learn to fly.

Set in 1960s Sydney, this is the story of an Australian gangster whose booming business, buoyed by the influx of U.S. soldiers in town for R&R during their tours in Vietnam, attracts the attention of first the Chicago mafia, and then their East Coast competitors.

A hot-shot lawyer is hired by a Hong Kong chemical plant to dispose of opposition to their polluting ways. But when he falls for a beautiful woman out to stop the plant, he is torn in a conflict of interest and asks his trusty friends Samo and Biao to help out at least until they discover the true purpose of the plant.

Laborie is a high-flying officer in the French special forces. Her mission is to escort Abedin Nexhep, a godfather of the Albanian mafia. Charged with heading a wide-reaching prostitution network, this formidable criminal is due to stand trial before a European court. During the transfer, killers hired by Nexhep set up an ambush to free their boss but Laborie and her men manage to escape...

In 35,000 BC, the tribe of the Dirty Hairs is at war against the tribe of the Clean Hairs for eight hundred years, trying to get their shampoo. The chief of the Dirty Hairs sends his daughter Guy disguised to the enemy tribe to get some shampoo for his tribe. When the healer of the Clean Hairs tribe surprisingly kills two cavemen of his tribe, their imbecile chief assigns Pierre with curled hair and Pierre blonde to investigate the murder and find the criminal.

In 1934, the second most lucrative business in New York City was running 'the numbers'. When Madam Queen—the powerful woman who runs the scam in Harlem—is arrested, Ellsworth 'Bumpy' Johnson takes over the business and must resist an invasion from a merciless mobster.

Frank Warren is a treasury agent assigned to put an end to the activities of a powerful mob crime boss. Frank works undercover, posing as a criminal to seek information, but is frustrated when all he finds are terrified witnesses and corrupt police officers.

A bad Polish actor is just trying to make a living when Poland is invaded by the Germans in World War II. His wife has the habit of entertaining young Polish officers while he's on stage, which is also a source of depression to him. When one of her officers comes back on a Secret Mission, the actor takes charge and comes up with a plan for them to escape.

An actress gets involved with a criminal gang and winds up taking the rap for a $40,000 bank robbery. Before being sent to prison, she steals the money from her partners and hides it, thinking to use it as a bargaining chip to be released from prison. However, her former partners have different ideas.

Two reporters search for a missing body in a wax museum.

Do you prefer to wax on or wax off? Preacher won't let you dance? Well then, put Baby in the corner and come on down, 'cause VH1 is bringing back more of the '80s you love in this feature-length film, Totally Awesome. The Gundersons have just moved across the country and the kids - Charlie, Lori, and Max - are trying their best to acclimate themselves into a new school and all kinds of dilemmas therein: the need to dance, the pitfalls of young love, the quest for popularity, scientific genius and of course the quirky but loveable Japanese gardener. Totally Awesome takes all your favorite '80s-flick mainstays and weaves them into the biggest and baddest plotline ever conceived. Tot say it is radical would be an understatement.

With the American Dream set in their minds, two pathetic gangsters, one Luxembourgish, the other German, go through various trials and tribulation in the South of Luxembourg.

The Devil arranges for a deceased gangster to return to Earth as a well-respected judge to make up for his previous life.

A small-time thug who collects debts for the local triad is torn between his criminal aspirations and his devotion to family.